| A Fresh Start |
[25 Apr 2008|09:41pm] |
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Restarting my journal after over a year away, I think I'll reintroduce myself.
I'm Megan, sometimes called Nico(especially online), I'm 22 and have an aqua faux-hawk/fade. I have a darling 15 month old boy and two step kids with my amazing fiance Ron. We haven't set a date for our wedding yet but I think its gonna be sometime next summer, details to come eventually. I am currently a SAHM but I'm planning on going back to school in the next year or so(welding is a go probability). I love making things, my current projects include tiny polymer clay foods, learning to spin, dying wool(yarn and roving) with cool aid, sewing poppets and learning to knit socks. I don't watch alot of tv, my weekly shows are Doctor Who and The Sarah Jane Adventures, I was watching Torchwood but the season ended last week(it was amazing btw) I also indulge in a bit of National Geographic channel occasionally. I am sad to admit that I haven't read anything new recently, I really need to get to the library at some point here. I'm hoping to get back into writing poetry, easier said than done... I am going to try and avoid having this blog turn into a baby blog, I don't want to turn into a mother who is solely defined by her child, I am me the person first and then me the mother second. I can't teach my kid to be ab independent functional human being if I get that mixed up. I am a tree hugging hippie and I am trying to do my part to keep my carbon footprint down, to that end I've been making fabric shopping bags to bring grocery shopping, if I can just remember to bring them with me I'll be in business :P.
Thats it for now, more later I'm sure.
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[03 Jan 2007|10:00pm] |
so I got a Stupid Sock Creatures kit at B&N with a christmas gift card, and I've been busting them out all week.
The first one, very simple and following almost exact instructions in the book
The second and waaay awesome, you can kinda see his long tail.
Number three, had to do some heel surgery on this one, and though you cant see it the tail is flowery
My most recent, yes those are two heads, he also has three legs.
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[14 Sep 2006|07:53pm] |
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in other news my wee baby toe is finally growing its nail back and no longer hurts like the dickens.
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[04 Sep 2006|10:31pm] |
um, wow.
two words:
Are Me
just...awesome!
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[15 Aug 2006|04:30pm] |
for christ sake people. this is worse than a messy breakup. stop freaking out and stop hurling insults(this includes everyone who commented on my last entry), maybe the whole situation is very grey and blurry but there are some things that are very clear:
taryn, i was never deliberatly mean to you, i just wanted you to do the dishes once in a while and not eat my food. im sorry if i was bitchy, thats the me you get when you are living with me. ask my family. bottom line here, best friends shouldnt live with eachother, and ive heard the same thing from many many people.
I never set out to be mean, and its very unfair to say i was never nice and never tried to be nice.
As for the whole thing about our dieing friendship...people change and relationships have to evolve with those changes, you guys just weren't willing to let things evolve. im not that same person i was in highschool, its too bad you found that unforgivable. its also too bad that you couldnt respect my opinions and choices regarding my life. you say that i should have respected your opinions, i do. i respect your opinions and choices regarding your life, but if respecting your opinion means changing my life to fit your opinion of how it should look, its not going to happen. i change for no one, and i live as i see fit not how other people think i should. I didnt ask you to like ron, i just wanted you accept that he was a part of my life.
it is nice to know that you accept part of the blame in all this. but to say that anyone would have acted the same in that situation is going a little far. i never would have done what you did. ever. even if i fucking loathed the guy you were with. you were my best friends and i never would have been that hateful towards either of you.
and now i am finished with the both of you, for good. some friendships dont last, even ones that were deep and lasted a long time. its just really shitty that you choose to end ours the way you did.
you'll find i disabled comments on my lj. this isnt an open forum anymore. my words and no one elses, im sure you can find somewhere else to put your thoughts on the matter.
dont talk to me, dont try and contact me in any way. im DONE.
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[09 Aug 2006|09:08pm] |
early august and i can alread feel autumn start to creep in. mostly in the morning, the little chill in the air and the colour of the sky in the afternoon. makes me happy, i love late summer and autumn, perfect weather. And I figure i got my fall upheaval out of the way early this year. shitty things happen and you move along and learn for the experience(blah blah blah...) I was always the outside anyway, so its really a small adjustment(in the "WTF?!" huge adjustment kind of way).
If you dont know the story... i dont feel like explaining on my lj. take me out for some kind of non-caffinated beverage or food of some sort and you'll get the whole story(my side mostly, but then all stories have a bias, to paraphrase obi-wan kenobi).
Drama aside, we're currently looking at apartments, fingers crossed for a nice duplex up at glenridge gardens. Im still at panera but looking forward to leaving in a few months due to (cue lights and music) pregnancy. Yep, I got knocked up, due at the end of this year. Excitment and nerves abound as i carry on the search for flattering maternity clothing and dark coloured infant clothing. We've decided on names if its a boy-Quentin, a girl-Isis.
I also got my braces off, finally and its really weird feeling. Ron's working at Access and making awesome commission. And I just found out that Specter is playing in gardiner on friday, yay show! I even have that day off. Anyone wanna go with?
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[28 Apr 2006|12:47pm] |
Freedom with all its loose limbed splendor
A crash, a burn, an instant rendered
The sudden loss and all its gaining
Rushing round in sun drenched springtime
Quickly quickly now regaining
All the things lost to complaining
Embrace the pain
The sharp point of fingers
Knowing that its all in healing
The flowers grow brightest
On these fields now reclaimed
Uncertainty lingers though hidden
By smoke from a cigarette
Celebration, retaliation
Alone for the first time and
Alive
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[27 Apr 2006|05:12pm] |
i have new hair!!!!! it makes me happy, and helped dispell the nervous tension in my stomach for a little while. new beginings, new hair cut.
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[26 Apr 2006|09:16pm] |
i've been betrayed
all my love
i gave it without a thought
and now i've realized
that you dont love
in the same way
i put my heart in your hands
trusted that you wouldnt
smash it on the desk
just like you did with
that glass last night
and im scared to say
"i love you"
in case you tell me
that i dont
and you bring up that phrase
at least once a day
"if you really loved me..."
so im here with a stomach ache
hating that i can still love you
trying not to cry
i trusted you
and you broke me
betrayed me
the end
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[26 Apr 2006|09:13pm] |
so here's an email i found that ron wrote to some chick:
I wish things were different. Everything seems so unfair to me right now. I know that I don't give myself enough credit. I just want to spend as much time as I can with you, Amanda. Kissing you, hugging you, holding you. I'm about ready to just do what I want despite how others feel or think. I try to get you out of my head by avoiding you, but I see you and I melt inside. And now you tell me that you don't want any of this... I can't be around you without wanting to do these things to you, it doesn't matter wether you promise to be good or not.
soso, needless to say i dumped him...now im home with my girls and doing ok, im a little wiped out from all this, but it wasnt just the email, it was everything; keeping me away from my friends, 'testing' my love for him, his off and one thing with his meds, the fact that he was lways right, his manipulations, the fact thatlast night after he said he didnt want to take his pill i said i would break up with him and got up to leave the bedroom and he grabbed me by the throat and pushed me back on the bed. i think i can safely say i wasnt in a healthy relationship that verged(or was, dpending onwho yo utalk to) on emotional abuse. so im done, hes not coming back into my life. the end. i want me back.
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[19 Feb 2006|10:40pm] |
so here are some(admitidly blurry) pictures of my injured finger for your viewing pleasure. pain. lots of pain. and nausea.
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[19 Feb 2006|10:12pm] |
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tonight at work i sliced the tip of my finger almost clean off. appearently we got new knives. no one told me. i was bleeding all over the place, it was awful. and its still bleeding a bit, the bandaids are nearlly soaked through. mother fucker it hurts. luckily its my left hand, but still. it sucks. ow. ow ow ow. i hate the sight of my own blood, i am still a bit queasy. eurg. gross.
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[17 Feb 2006|07:34pm] |
so i went shopping today and got a load of yummy healthy things. pears, apples, alvacados, tomatoes, a cukember, garlic, cream cheese, yogurt, tortilla wraps, etc. i made a wrap when i got home. it was delicious. alvacado slices and tomatoe bits with lime juice and cilantro sprinkled over them. its like eating gaucamole but in a wrap. nummy!
this is kind of my attempt at eating a little healthier and warding off scurvy.
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[09 Feb 2006|11:59pm] |
i hurted my leg. grr, stupid snow. i was getting into my car and i slipped on the pile of ice/old snow next to my car because it was covered in light snow and my leg caught under my car resulting in a spectacular bruise on my shin and no injury to my rear at all.
in other news...im going to see specter tommorrow night, im sure it will rock hard as always. also, i made a pretty lolita-ish dress the other night, pictures eventually.
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[27 Jan 2006|12:03am] |
ok, so tiki and i took some pictures tonight. the results(a select few) are under the cut.
( I'm a fucking lady! )
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[24 Jan 2006|12:35am] |
so Im a little drunk right now. tis quite fun. ill update on the state of my life later, right now im too drunk. ok, off to put on a pretty dress, why? coz im DRUNK, thats why. haha, yeah.
also, twisted tea fucking rocks. no hangover. yeah.
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[19 Jan 2006|11:43pm] |
whoa, check out my hot boyfriend. yeah, i picked those glasses out. and the shirt. and the pinstriped pants you cant see, the ones that make his ass look very very nice.
yeah, my boyfriend is hotter than yours.
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[10 Jan 2006|12:03am] |
Happy 30th birthday, darlin'!
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[09 Jan 2006|01:00am] |
breath for me baby
ragged hitching rythym
burn for me
cheeks turning pink
delicate rose below
blue eyes, closed
dance with me
this music
hearts thudding
breath catching
hold me close
your hands and
my skin
electric, and I
breath for you
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[31 Dec 2005|03:46am] |
is it bad that i've slept for 16 hours the past two nights? from around 3 in the morning until 6ish at night. granted i'm awake a little in the morning when ron gets home( o.O ) but, yeah...thats alot of sleep. Maybe its the cold weather putting me into hibernation mode, i dunno. My body's internal clock is doing that flashing thing that digital clocks do when they get unplugged. I haven't really seen sunlight since wednsday.
Also, get thee to my my-spizzle(www.myspace.com/megan_nicoline) and check out my new pictures(yay for my new camera!), there's a really great one of ron and i looking gothy and cute.
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nico_yumi's journal